Pieces

This is taken from a much longer Blog I wrote that I am simply not comfortable in posting yet, if ever.  I am not writing to hurt anyone or mudsling, however true the facts, so I won't decide to satisfy my ego through unnecessary jabbing exposes of particular individuals, if I can help it.  This is a struggle because part of my humanity wants to 'get even' while the rest of me is hoping to just 'move on'.  If cornered, I am more than equipped to 'get even' and just knowing this should be good enough for my ego:

"Regardless of my talent, skill, energy and aptitude, I just want to fall in love with and marry a man who will protect me because the idea of reaching the success I desire all on my own would have to encompass forgoing any sense of truth or integrity I reserve and adopting the very shallow character of those who steal my identity and original ideas to use as their camouflage in the eyes of the CONtrolled public...all while seeming like the diligent, hard-working folk who deserve it in the eyes of those sold on the illusion?

(I think the word 'publication' so interesting.  It's 'public creation', in my mind.)  

Isn't it upside down funny that simply because I refuse to sell out to corruption that has been seducing me to join in for quite some time, I am forced to accept that I am 'banned' from succeeding with my own, God-given gifts and to allow bullies to terrorize and arrogantly rape my life for everything I say and do in the name of whatever their Attorneys design as legally organized rationalization?  

This apparently 'shallow' desire I openly admit is whole-heartedly more honest and honorable of a desire in this upside down world than the hogwash lies sold as a smokescreen for truth, serving to sell out the integrity and foundation of this great country I love...all to keep the control among the few mass entities that claim to be the same as the 'people'? Ha!  

The real shallow folks are those who trade their souls to perform the on demand song and dance to satisfy the sticky Court's cravings and their giant egos.  I would rather be claimed as who I am by someone who would love and honor me for exactly that, than to sell my talent, truth and passion simply to bend over as a jester on demand....all to live a fake image that I give and do responsible things in the world with my big money; a politically correct performance to gain the public's respect that I succeeded on my own as a woman...Ha!  It's just a BIG LIE!  Let them judge me as a 'stupid, fake blond' for all I care.  I know who I am and I respect the value of being me far more than I care about shallow-led conclusions of envy and mislead hate.   

l don't mind burning bridges over this still, troubled water in exchange for the opportunity to take an entirely different way; A vibrant, freshwater, passionate journey of a soul, intact. Imagine.

Enter Please (timing is everything, as they say): My Knight in Shining Armor...I love you!